Today, we’re featuring a beautiful personal project from photographer Meredith Green. With the I Am Project, Meredith tackles the transformative process of motherhood through images captured on black and white 35mm film. Scroll below to view the series and read an essay from Meredith about the I Am Project.
Analog cameras and films used: Canon EOS Rebel GII (Find at KEH Camera or on eBay) | Kodak Tri-X 400 (Find on Amazon), Ilford HP5 Plus (Find on Amazon), Bergger Pancro 400 (Find at Adorama)
Connect with Meredith: Website | Instagram
I Am Project
A Photo Essay by Meredith Green
In September of 2021, I picked up a film camera not knowing what I was doing or quite sure what to expect. I wasn’t unhappy with my digital camera, but a series of events landed me with a film camera in hand, and I decided to play.
What’s happened since is a creative awakening and desire to develop more of an artistic eye, plus capture what fills me creatively. Shooting film has been a whole new learning process, and I’ve barely scratched the basics surface. I enjoy the delayed gratification and uncertainty that comes with the process of film.
It was only by shooting film that I realized I had something I wanted to express within myself through my work, beyond family photography. Thus, this project was born.
I turn forty later this year, and my thirties have been transformative through marriage, career, and social changes. However, nothing has changed my life like motherhood has.
In an instance, you’re a different person. The joys. The lows. The love. The loneliness. There are parts of yourself and your life you don’t even know you should grieve until it’s too late. Yet, you willingly let go.
Motherhood has tested every limit with myself. The future looks different. Feelings I thought were long gone, resurface. Days become blurs from the mundane of taking care of others. Yet, I feel love in a whole new way and wouldn’t go back.
This project has been an opportunity for me to explore feelings as I’ve grown as a woman over the last decade and become a mom: frustration, being torn, drained, lost, needed by everyone, worried about humanity’s future, yet hopeful, curious, striving to be comfortable in my own skin, connected and free.
Since this was my first personal film project, I didn’t feel experienced enough to shoot self-portraits of everything I wanted to explore. My friend, Becca, agreed to model for me. She made my vision come to life. I am grateful for her patience and the emotions she portrayed here.
The images were shot on a Canon EOS Rebel GII on Kodak Tri-X 400, Ilford HP5 Plus, Bergger Pancro 400 B&W film stocks.
The film variety is a lack of pre-planning on my part and my local camera store being low on stock. Since it was the day of the shoot, I decided to embrace this mistake on my part and just mix it up.
However, since this project was inspired by capturing what I felt inside, I appreciate the inconsistency and realness as a reflection of me.
Thank you so much, Meredith! You can find more of Meredith’s work on her website and Instagram.
Check out all of our film photography features here, and if you want to have your own film work featured on the site, view our submissions process!
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